Good Clean Fun
Here's our weekly dosage of some good, clean and fun entertainment =) And for all the animal lovers out there
Excerpts from a Dog's Daily:
7:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVOURITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVOURITE!
12:30 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVOURITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVOURITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
7:00 pm - OH BOY! PLAYING BALL! MY FAVOURITE!
9:30 pm - OH BOY! SLEEPING ON MASTER'S BED! MY FAVOURITE!
Excerpts from a Cat's Daily:
(Day 193 of my captivity!)
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. Pricks!! The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. Heh heh..
Today my attempt to kill my captors, by weaving around their feet while they were walking, almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs next time. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile captors, I again induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair. (Note to self: I think I'll try crapping under their bed, too. Wonder how long it'll take them to find it?)
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Darn! Not working according to plan...
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "ellergeez". Must learn what on earth this is and how to use it to my advantage..
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a real half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, appears to have become an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in his metal room, his safety is preserved. But I can wait; it's only a matter of time ... little snitch!!"
Courtesty of sweet and innocent CHLOE =)
Excerpts from a Dog's Daily:
7:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVOURITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVOURITE!
12:30 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVOURITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVOURITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
7:00 pm - OH BOY! PLAYING BALL! MY FAVOURITE!
9:30 pm - OH BOY! SLEEPING ON MASTER'S BED! MY FAVOURITE!
Excerpts from a Cat's Daily:
(Day 193 of my captivity!)
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. Pricks!! The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. Heh heh..
Today my attempt to kill my captors, by weaving around their feet while they were walking, almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs next time. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile captors, I again induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair. (Note to self: I think I'll try crapping under their bed, too. Wonder how long it'll take them to find it?)
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Darn! Not working according to plan...
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "ellergeez". Must learn what on earth this is and how to use it to my advantage..
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a real half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, appears to have become an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in his metal room, his safety is preserved. But I can wait; it's only a matter of time ... little snitch!!"
Courtesty of sweet and innocent CHLOE =)
posted by the author at 3:04 AM
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